What’s Your Hurry?

What’s your hurry?  As a child, and even in my later years, I always heard that expression from the previous generation when we would conclude a visit and say, “We have to go.”  And it was interesting that almost without exception, the response was something rather vague, like, “Well, we have to get up early tomorrow,” or “We just need to get back home”.  The truth is, we usually didn’t have a good reason.  These were often just words we used to help us get out the door.  And, to be honest, the question of why we were in a hurry was just as likely an attempt at politeness intended to usher us out.  But not always.

At my church, we close each service with a prayer, and then a congregational song.  This morning, as is apt to happen on any given Sunday, the call to bow our heads in prayer was met with a mild stampede as many made their way to the exits.  As I bowed my head, I yielded to the temptation to open my eyes and observe the rush of feet past my pew.  Yes, I know that was inappropriate.  But it was very revealing.  Several pairs of dress shoes, casual shoes and athletic shoes passed across my view as I stared at the floor.

Now, lest you think that my purpose is to criticize those who left before the service had concluded,  that is not the case.  I can assure you that I have done the same thing on occasion, when I believed I had a reason and sometimes when I didn’t.  And I’m just as sure that most of these folks had a reason.  So they are not my point.  Not at all.

So, what is my point?  Well I’m glad you asked.  It’s simply this.  Why are we always in such a hurry?  Why are we so often shifting gears internally?  Why do we walk to our cars at a pace just below a trot?  Why do we need to be the first one out of the parking lot?  Why do we need to finish our meal in a rush, even at the risk of indigestion or heartburn?  Why does a twenty minute wait at a restaurant frustrate us?  And let’s not even talk about that stalled drive-thru at the fast food restaurant!

Guilty.  I am guilty as anyone (and more than most) of too often being in a hurry.  Maybe not as often as I once was, but I’m still guilty.  Whether I’m leaving church, a movie theater, the airport or even a  friend or relative’s house, I am moving toward the parking lot and my waiting vehicle at a warp speed.  And let’s just say that any wait at a drive-thru has the potential to cause me more than a modicum of anxiety. 

I’ve even been guilty of sighing when we arrive at our destination and my wife only begins to gather her things after we have parked.  Why does she do that?  Why can’t she have her things gathered so that when I turn of the engine, we can get out of this car pronto?  By the way, I have never won that battle and don’t anticipate that I will.

Why do you think life is this way?  What’s the hurry?  Do we have something important that we have to get to?  Maybe some of the time we’re late for an appointment or start time, but does that explain every occasion when we are in a hurry and zip in and out of traffic to capture every available second?  I’m convinced there is some correlation between a rising speedometer and rising blood pressure.  I can’t prove it, but I believe it.

But here’s the paradox.  Put me on the beach for my summer vacation and I’m no longer in a hurry.  The only place I rush is to the beach in the morning, so that I can doze and read all day, and take that occasional dip in the ocean to cool off.  And if we go out to dinner and we’re told the wait is an hour, or even longer, we calmly stand around or find a place to sit and enjoy the relaxing time of leisure.  I drive slower, I eat slower.  I wouldn’t be surprised to find out that I even talk slower!  A week of relaxed, slow paced rest and enjoyment.  Yep.  This is my happy place.

Then comes the day we head home.  What happens?  You know the answer as well as I do.  It’s rush, rush rush to get the car loaded.  It’s finding that point just over the speed limit that will allow us to “stay on schedule” getting home.  It’s trying to limit the number of rest stops. It’s that frustration with the line of traffic and that knucklehead in front who won’t go faster!

Now I can’t explain all this.  I don’t have an answer.  But I have a couple of thoughts.  And I hope you’ll do me a favor.  Will you offer a comment and give me your thoughts?  I’m genuinely interested.

Now, here is what I think.  First, I think we have become accustomed to sound bites, quick and short comments on social media, television shows where a six hour book is condensed into a 60 minute program and rush delivery on everything we order.  We’ve become conditioned to everything being done faster, and we’ve gotten caught up in the pace.  We’ve forgotten how to be patient and less rushed.

Secondly, I think we allow the expectations of others to control our thinking and our pace.  Everyone is in a hurry, so I must be too.  I don’t want to be the straggler or the holdup.  I don’t want to be the one accused of wasting time.  I don’t want to be the group sloth.

Wasting time?  Is that what we think is the result of slowing down?  True, we can waste time by doing things that are either unimportant or that distract us from meaningful activity.  We can waste time by doing things the wrong way.  But I’m not sure that slowing down is wasting time.  Maybe it’s making more of the time we have.  Not more in quantity, but more in quality.  Maybe the best way to use our time wisely is to slow down and enjoy it.  Maybe we just need to breathe more and pant less.

In 1974, singer Mac Davis recorded a song entitled “Stop and Smell the Roses”.  The song was written by Davis and Doc Severinson, the trumpeter and bandleader on the old Johnny Carson tonight show.   The song became a Top 10 hit, reaching number one status on some charts.  For copyright and space reasons, I won’t include the lyrics here, but the song asks the same question I have asked here.  And then it offers some pretty sound advice, such as stopping to smell the roses, counting our blessings, spending time with our family, walking through a forest, and hearing the voice of God.  I would encourage you to look it up online and listen to it.

I think that song appealed to those of us alive then not only because of the catchy tune, but also because it offered a good reminder of how we ought to enjoy our time here and how we don’t need to miss out on the important things of life.  And if that reminder was needed in 1974, how much more is that the case today.  Maybe I’m wrong, but we seem to be on too many superhighways, whether it be the information superhighway or the interstate.

And I don’t think that’s necessarily a good thing.  Certainly, these things have merit and are useful.  But have they become the controlling influence of our lives?  Have they altered the way we live our lives in relationship to the expectations of others?  Have smartphones, the internet, text messaging, and other advances taken us prisoner?

If so, it’s not the fault of the devices.  It’s not the fault of faster, more reliable cars and highways.  Those are conveniences to be used and enjoyed.  It’s our fault.  Yours and mine.  We have allowed the capabilities of equipment and the expectations of others to transform us into a faster, less relaxed version of ourselves.

If that sounds dark and heavy, I don’t mean for it too.  I love my smartphone and smart television as much as anybody.  Truth is, these things ought to make our lives more enjoyable and less hurried.  But we’ve learned to use them to do just the opposite. 

I’m going to try to slow down today, tomorrow, this week, this year.  I’m going to, as the song says, “stop and smell the roses”. And I’m going to start thinking about that week at the beach and bring out my Jimmy Buffett music.

If we can upgrade our technology, surely we can upgrade the quality of our lives.  Just something to slow down and think about.

Have a great, unhurried day!